Namaste

Paintballing didn’t happen. Kyle and I  got amped up to shoot each other and cured our hangovers at a place called Peppers. Then, we drove out into the country in search of the next amazing hobby. I was more than disappointed when we arrived to North Alabama Paintball. It was basically an overgrown soccer field, fenced in by a ratty net with large holes. Protection from your opponents consisted of stacked cement blocks posing as walls scattered throughout the battlefield. This paintball ghost town was overseen by an inbred cooking meth in a yellow lopsided trailer at the entrance of the park. Needless to say, we bailed. I had so many grand expectations for paintballing. Haven’t these people seen the movie Failure to Launch? Matthew McConaughey and Sarah Jessica Parker make shooting strangers and running around an inflatable castle look glamorous and exciting. Oh, you haven’t seen the movie? Don’t...it sucks.

I needed to find another hobby and fast. Shrinky dinking was fun, but I ran out of the special paper by Thursday. Sunday evening I tried to wash off my frustration with a bubble bath, but I couldn’t. I’ve always had a really hard time relaxing. I don’t know if I know how to just chill out. I’ll admit it, I’m wound a little too tight. I try to clear my mind and picture white light or imagine myself gazing at clouds in a meadow. These attempts at meditation are often interrupted with...YOU DON’T HAVE A JOB.....YOU ARE -30.12 IN YOUR BANK ACCOUNT.....YOU HAVE CROW’S FEET. Very irritating. But on this Sunday evening my irritation subsided and a lightbulb turned on. My hobby list had the answer....YOGA.

I recalled a sign I saw at this bar Kyle and I have taken a liking to called On the Rocks. It was advertising a yoga studio, and I made a mental note. I tried yoga about 7 years ago, before it was insanely popular. It did not leave me with an invigorating feeling. This was probably because Willie Nelson’s doppleganger was doing a headstand in the center of the room while breathing and snorting like a freight train. So I pulled a typical Anna move and got the hell out of that studio. However, I am new and improved and looking for adventure.

Earlier this evening I attended a yoga class at Shoals Yoga. I took a Level 1 Hatha Yoga Class. It’s an introduction to the Hatha Yoga practice and is focused on proper breathing and yoga postures. The website ensured that I would have a feeling of complete peace upon completion. And you know what? I did and still do! I feel like I’m floating on a cloud, and I cannot stop smiling. This class was exactly what I needed to take the edge off. You don’t realize that most of the time, you are breathing too shallowly or not breathing correctly whatsoever. Apparently, I did not know how to breathe properly before this experience. The yoga session wasn’t incredibly grueling or painful. It was just what the doctor ordered. I think I may keep this hobby.