Not having any money is a major downer. Sucky weather is also a bummer. But the combination of being poor and cold can take any person to a deep, dark place they would never wish upon anyone. I could not be happier that January is finally over. According to the President and other important people, 2011’s January was the worst month that has ever existed. I’m pretty sure I read that somewhere.
Which brings me to address a very important issue: seasonal depression. Seasonal depression, or seasonal affective disorder (SAD) occurs at a specific time each year for many people. Often times, it starts in the fall and ends around springtime. Many refer to it as “the winter blues.” According to the Cleveland Clinic, you might have a case of SAD if you are always tired, lack energy, prefer to be alone, or crave carbohydrates. Furthermore, women between the ages of 20-40 are more prone to SAD.
Okay. When I read this I initially thought, “ I have SAD all the time and so do a lot of my friends.” I panicked. But do not fear! There is a way to treat SAD. Apparently, bitchy women shoving bread in their mouths can participate in LIGHT THERAPY. Basically, you go to a doctor and they flash really bright florescent lights close to your face. Abracadabra! You’re all better. Side effects include eye strain and headaches. Shocker.
If you don’t have the bones to pay for light therapy, there are other things you can do to get out of your rut. The Cleveland Clinic suggests these no-brainers to feeling better: exercising three times a week for thirty minutes, spending time with friends, seeing a shrink....blah, blah, blah.
These suggestions sound all fine and dandy, but I know and you know that it is all crap. You’re not going to do these things to help yourself. It’s all boring. It is time to think outside of the box, so that we can officially put a stop to this cabin fever bologna. I have listed some ideas that have pulled me out of my winter blues:
Make a Stoup
I have made Rachael Ray’s delightful Hungarian Hot Sausage and Lentil Stoup (it’s stew and soup combined) twice this winter. It’s got great flavor and a lot of heat. The recipe makes such a large batch that you can freeze half of it to eat later.
I need to be frank with you. It gives you really bad gas and terrible diarrhea. So don’t eat it if you have somewhere important to go later. If you’re one of those freaks that doesn’t fart in front of other people, you probably shouldn’t make this recipe. Because there is no way of stopping it. Don’t even waste your time taking the Beano.
Blueberry Toss
Go to the grocery store and buy a large container of blueberries. When you return home, divide the blueberries with a partner and stand about ten feet away from each other. Toss blueberries to each other and try to catch them with your mouths. If ten feet proves to be to easy, then increase the distance. Kyle and I played this for about thirty minutes the other night. There is no way you can do this without laughing or wetting your pants.
Make a Sun Mobile
The sun rarely makes an appearance in my neck of the woods. I wasn’t going to just sit around and moan and groan about how much I miss the sunshine. Right now I’m making a sun to hang from my ceiling. I took an XL paper bag and cut two large circles from it. I painted one side of each circle a happy yellow. Next, I’m going to staple the circles together (yellow sides facing out). However, I need to leave an opening between the two circles so that I can stuff it with newspaper to give it some bulk. Then, I’ll cut out cardboard strips from a shoe box to make the sun rays. I plan on painting both sides yellow. I’ll glue them to the inside of the sun (in between the staples). Lastly, I’ll punch a hole in it and hang it up.
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| I hope this sun....... |
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| ...makes me feel like I'm looking at this sun. |
Play Scrabble
I don’t mean play Words with Friends. Too many times I catch Kyle and I sitting next to each other, playing each other in Words with Friends. Although, sometimes we change it up and play in different rooms. I know this is stupid and ridiculous. The other evening, we pulled out our real Scrabble board and played a round. Even though he won, it was still pretty fun and more challenging than the Iphone version.
Change the Channel
I was once obsessed with the E! and Bravo networks. Yes, this is embarrassing for me to admit. What is so entertaining about watching a bunch of drunk people dance and scream at one another? What is so mesmerizing about two people getting into a really awkward confrontation. Who knows? I knew I had to find new shows when I was experiencing physical pain when viewing my usual programs. Do you ever have to change the channel because whatever is on television is just too humiliating to watch? I found myself doing this a lot, so I turned to HGTV. I’ve learned a lot about design and now feel comfortable with a few do-it-yourself projects. I also love watching Bang for Your Buck. There is something really pleasurable about watching rich people being told that they have bad taste.
Foster an Animal
This has definitely taken my mind off of the fact that it has been disgusting outside for what feels like a million years. Brutus, a short-haired German Pointer, has brought so much happiness to our house. As my friend put it, he is Buddhdog....the Buddha of Dogs. Prior to bringing him into our home, I had two sweet, hyperactive dogs. Now I have three mellow dogs. I thought Brutus was the perfect dog...until Saturday afternoon. Around 2:30, I let Brutus and Linus out in the backyard to play for a bit. About ten minutes later, I opened the door to let them back inside. Linus was there but no Brutus.
SHHHHIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTT! I was worried to say the least. I honestly did not think he could fit under our fence. Linus, who is smaller than Brutus cannot fit under our fence. Kyle and I spent a good part of the afternoon riding our bikes and driving around looking for him. No Brutus. I felt horrible. I called the shelter to let them know how badly I messed up. I immediately started drinking Merlot to numb the pain. That night, Kyle and I dined at Crocodile Ed’s. It’s like Powerhouse but not as good. We ate in silence. When returning home, I found Linus whining like a crazy dog. Not typical of him. I figured he just needed to pee and opened the door to let him out. And wouldn’t you know....there was Brutus...on our back deck....five hours later. I couldn’t believe it . He hadn’t been with us for 24 hours and still found his way back to our house. So I’m going with my first opinion of Brutus.....he is the perfect dog.
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| He is currently getting his balls cut off. |
